“So, are you sure you want to be an Anthropologist?”, was asked of me today in half-jest. I didnt answer. Instead I completely unnaturally shifted the conversation to my lab work and pointed to the lab book and began talking while I looked at it admiringly. And I was not making eye contact with the person who asked me that question on purpose.
What I realized in that flash of a moment is that it is sometimes easier to have a little project to worry about—its mini triumphs, its minute falls and complexities and most of all its soothing monotony and detachment from the world—than it is to always think big.
One of the difficulties of my working life, and of my life, has been that I am always looking for the big picture in what I do, from being a restaurant hostess, to a graphic designer, to a laboratory technician. What does it all mean? How am I changing the world? How is the world changing me? The answers are hardly ever satisfactory.
As I pointed to the graph paper pages in the book and to my neat handwriting on them, the feeling flowered inside of me that, on a rainy April afternoon, its sometimes nice just to look at the little picture.